The Giant and the Tailor

The Giant and the TailorThe Giant and the Tailor

A tailor and a giant have met before in our adventures with the Grimm’s brothers. This story has less cheese.

Once upon a time there was a tailor who had decided that he really, really wanted to travel the world. We call that wanderlust my friends. He packed up his bags and left his shop. He would go here and he would go there. He really wasn’t too concerned about where he was going.

One day he happened to see something that confused him. He decided to get a closer look. What he saw was a tower with legs and it leapt over a hill. It turns out it wasn’t a tower at all but a giant. The giant asked the little bug what he was going around here and the tailor responded that he was just looking for a way to earn some bread. The giant said the tailor might as well come and work for him. The tailor asked what his wages were going to be and the giant said he would give him three-hundred and sixty-five days and in a leap year he would give him three-hundred and sixty-six days. The tailor figured being alive was a pretty good deal and decided to go and work for the giant but escape at his earliest convenience.

The thing about the tailor was that the tailor liked the brag, about everything. He liked the boast and say he could turn water into wine, things like that. He was full of crap, but the giant didn’t know this. The giant told the tailor to get a bucket of water. The tailor asked if he should bring the well and the spring too. At first the giant didn’t think this was that big of a deal, but then he thought the tailor must be something odd. He decided that maybe the tailor had a mandrake in his body and he better be on his guard.

The giant then asked the tailor to go chop down some firewood. The tailor asked if he should chop down the whole forest at once. The giant now suspected he was harboring some kind of wizard and chose to be very careful around the tailor. The giant wanted to be rid of the tailor but decided to sleep on it.

The next day the giant and the tailor took a walk down by some willow trees. The giant told the tailor that he would really like to see if the tailor could weigh down one of the willow branches. The tailor made himself as heavy as possible wanting to appear strong to the giant, but had to take a breath. When he did, the willow branch swung him up into the air and far away. The giant never saw him again.

The End

The Giant and the TailorObservations

I researched mandrakes a bit. I know you’re thinking about the screaming plants from Harry Potter, because I know you’ve seen Harry Potter because you’re reading this article. The Harry Potter depiction of mandrakes are not the only things a mandrake is known for. Mandrakes are supposed to look like a person. They’re a heavily rooted plant, some might say tuberous. Throughout the ages mandrakes have been closely associated with herbalism, lore, and witchcraft. They’re even mentioned in the Bible as an aphrodisiac and fertility aid. In this story the giant says that the little man must have a mandrake in him.

Mandrakes have also developed some other strange traits. They could be something of their own being which you had to feed and take care of. They could bring you fortune, or they could bring you misfortune. If ingested, they possess compounds that could be hallucinogenic. They’ve also been associated with demonic possession. So we can assume either the giant thinks this tailor is high or that he’s possessed. So in essence, the giant is superstitious.

The Giant and the TailorThemes

The giant gets scared of something he shouldn’t be scared of, but the tailor bluffs his way into life and maybe death. We don’t know what happens to the tailor. Maybe he’s dead. He was swung high into the air by a willow branch, he might be dead. It’s not the falling that’s going to kill him; it’s the landing, but maybe he survived. If he did survive he bluffed his way out of danger. The giant implied pretty heavily that he was going to grind this guy’s bones if he didn’t do what he said. If he didn’t survive, he bluffed his way more quickly into his death.

It’s really one of those Schrodinger type of situations. We don’t know the outcome, so we can’t really feel one way or the other. We just have to guess at both outcomes. Is he ok? I don’t know. Is he dead? I don’t know. We can look at this outcome, or lack thereof, and consider this, bluffing can get you out of some sticky situations or it can put you into some sticky situations. Sometimes you don’t know how it’s going to turn out. You’re bluffing and it’s really a coin-toss as to if you’re going to come out ahead or not.

So remember to use your bluffing skills with caution. You might get lucky or you might end up swimming with the fishies, or flying through the air like a nerf ball.

Overall

Why do giants and tailors hang out so much? Wouldn’t there be other people and beings more appropriate for them to be with?


The Little Folks’ Presents

The Little Folks' PresentsThe Little Folks’ Presents

It’s ambitious to want more, but sometimes you’ve got to be happy with what you have, even if it’s a lump of coal.

Once upon a time a tailor and a goldsmith were traveling together. They heard some music in the woods and instead of going the opposite direction as anyone hearing banjos in the Appalachians would do, they went towards the music. They saw a crowd of little men and women dancing. They were singing. There was an old man there who was taller than the rest of them. He wore a multi-colored coat and had a very long beard.

The old man signaled to the tailor and the goldsmith that they should join in. The goldsmith who had a hump on his back, jumped right in the dance, the tailor was a little more apprehensive, but also joined in the fun. The old man soon pulled out a knife and began to sharpen it. The tailor and the goldsmith were a little concerned at this, but went along with it. The old man then seized first the goldsmith and then the tailor and shaved all the hair off their heads, even their beards. He then patted them on the back and motioned for them to put some coals in their pockets. They went with it and filled their pockets with coals.

Soon it was time to find shelter for the night. The men found an inn and got into bed. They were so tired they didn’t take the coals out of their pockets. In the morning they awoke to find their pockets very heavy. In the place of the coals, there was a lot of gold. They were both very rich men now and to top it all off, their hair had grown back overnight. The tailor was content to go home and marry his “dear object,” because that’s what he called his girlfriend. The goldsmith on the other hand wanted more gold.

He went back to the woods. Once again he met the people. Once again he let the old man shave his head and beard. He stuff as much coal as he could into his pockets. He went to sleep again, but all that was in his pockets when he woke up was coal. He facepalmed himself, but discovered that his hair had not grown back either. In addition to all of that, he also discovered that he now had a hump on his chest to match the one on his back. He recognized that he had been punished for his greed.

The tailor who was a good guy, besides that whole girlfriend objectification thing, said that the goldsmith could stay with him because they were traveling companions. The rest of the goldsmith’s life he wore a cap upon his head because his hair never grew back.

The End

The Little Folks' PresentsObservations

My dear object how I love you so. My dear object will you get me some coffee? My dear object will you move? You’re standing in the way of the game…

Seriously dude? No, seriously? She’s not even a person and he says that. She’s an object. When he has friends over, he probably tells them to just put their coats anywhere, even on the wife, because she’s just an object like the table.

I say “facepalmed,” but the story says, “he smote his forehead with his dusty black hand, and then he felt that his whole head was bald and smooth.” It’s pretty much the same thing. I just said it in fewer words.

I wish I had some of whatever they had to make their hair grow back so fast.

The Little Folks' PresentsThemes

If you’ve got a pocket full of gold you should probably be happy that you have pocket full of gold and not try to get another pocket full of gold. Your pocket is already full, where’s it going to go?

We do have a tendency to want more. It feels good: I like it; I want more. There is such a thing as diminishing returns though. Sometimes we get something or try something for the first time and it’s awesome. So we search for that first-time again. Some situations might be better, but others, don’t turn out like we desire. Each successive effort seems to yield less than the time before. I hear that this is how getting high on certain drugs works. The first time is awesome, but each successive time takes more and more to get anywhere near the same feeling. I know all of this because I’m so up with drugs, as you can tell.

Sometimes we just have to look around and say, “I’ve head enough meth. The meth I had was pretty good.  It’s not going to get any better, and besides, all my teeth are falling out.”

In the end, just be happy with what you were blessed with.

Overall

I sure hope these coals were cooled down when they put them in their pockets. Hot coals in your pockets probably wouldn’t feel too good. They might have ended up with gold, but they also might have ended up with third-degree burns. It gives a whole new meaning to money burning a hole in your pocket.

Yes, I did just do that. Now I’m going to put on some sun glasses and walk away.


The Four Skillful Brothers

The Four Skillful BrothersThe Four Skillful Brothers

Ah, another story about brothers. Hey Bro, I love you man! Bros before hoes, and so on.

A man once had four sons. He told them that he didn’t have anything to give to them, so they must go out into the world and make their own way. They each set out with their sticks, because what boy doesn’t carry a stick? The came to a crossroads that had roads going in four directions. They each chose to take one of the roads and vowed to meet back up at the exact same spot in four years.

The eldest brother met a man who offered to teach him the ways of thievery. The brother wasn’t so sure about being a thief  because, “that is no longer regarded as a reputable trade,” because apparently there was a time when being a thief was reputable. The master thief convinced him otherwise. He enticed him saying that he could teach him to be such a good thief that people wouldn’t know what had hit them. So the brother was like, “Sure.” The master thief was good to his word and the brother was such a good thief, that anything he desired he could get and without detection.

The second brother went on his way and met a man who offered to teach him to be an astronomer. He enticed him offering that nothing would be hidden to him. The second brother thought this was a great idea and soon could find out anything with his telescope.

The third brother met a huntsman who taught him to be very skillful. As a parting gift, he gave him a gun that would allow him to shoot anything he desired and he would never miss.

The youngest son met a tailor. The tailor was like, “Yo, come be a tailor, it’s cool,” and the youngest brother was like, “No, I don’t think so, only nerds are tailors,” and the tailor was like, “Not with my kind of tailoring, only the bad-a**est of the bad-a**es know how to tailor like I do.” The youngest brother was drawn in with promises of swag and women, or something like that. He became a great tailor and upon parting, the tailor gave him a needle. He admonished him that this needle could sew through anything and once it was sewn together, it would appear as if it were one piece.

The men all met at the crossroads four years after the beginning of their journey. They went home to their father, who wanted to test them. He asked the second son to tell him how many eggs were in the nest way up yonder. The second son used his telescope to tell his father that there were five eggs in the nest. The father asked the oldest son to steal the eggs from the nest without the mother bird noticing. He was able to do this. The father then set the five eggs on a table and told the third son to shoot them all in two with only one shot. The third son took his special gun and shot the eggs in two with one shot. The father asked the youngest son to sew the eggs and the baby birds back together. If the baby birds were able to live afterwards he would have proven his skill. The youngest did sew the baby birds back together and when it was time for them to hatch, they hatched like any other baby birds. They had thin red lines around their necks from where they had been sewn back together.

The father told his sons he was very proud of them and that their skills would profit them. Not long after there was a big hubbub in the country. It seems the king’s only daughter had been kidnapped. There was reward. Whosoever could rescue her could have her for a wife. The four sons knew they could handle this.

The second son used his telescope to spy the princess. She was on an island in the middle of the sea guarded by a dragon. The sons got on a boat and traveled there. They didn’t know how to get her away from the dragon. The first son volunteered to steal her away without the dragon knowing. He was able to do this and the boat set off at a fast pace away, but the dragon woke up and noticed his princess was gone. He followed. The third son shot the dragon with his gun, but the dragon landed on the boat and smashed it to pieces. That was no matter though, because the youngest son soon sewed the boat back together.

The king was happy to get his daughter back, but she couldn’t share four men, so they had to decide amongst themselves who would get the princess. They all had valid claims as to why each of them should have her. Without the second son, they wouldn’t have known where she was. Without the first son they wouldn’t have gotten her away from the dragon. Without the third son they would have been eaten by the dragon. Without the fourth son they would have drowned in the sea. The king finally told the bickering ninnies that none of them could have his daughter because they couldn’t agree, but he would give them each half of the kingdom(not sure how that’s supposed to work out mathematically). They all lived in peace and harmony for the rest of their days.

The End

The Four Skillful BrothersObservations

Look, I don’t know how four guys each get a half of something. The only was I can figure out how this worked is that there was more than one of something. Maybe this king had more than one kingdom. Maybe he just meant you four can share half of my kingdom. If that’s the case, how come the four couldn’t have shared the princess?

So at what point in history was being a thief honorable? If this man does imply that it’s not an honorable profession *anymore,* when was it an honorable profession? Was there a time in history where people were like, “We love Toby the thief. He’s awesome. He’s like our rock star”? I don’t ever recall anyone other than another thief saying being a thief was awesome. People don’t like thieves. It’s not nice to take someone else’s stuff.

Chop unborn baby birds in half then sew them back together, nice. I’m kidding, that’s totally gross and cruel. It’s like some sort of strange Frankenstein experiment. I also posit that this would be impossible seeing as a regular sized bullet would pretty much rip an unborn baby bird apart. There wouldn’t be anything to sew back together, but then again, maybe that’s why the needle in this story is so awesome.

The Four Skillful BrothersThemes

Why is everyone hating on tailors? It’s been a common theme in the Grimm’s fairy tales that somehow tailors are deceitful, evil, and uncool, apparently. Look, without tailors, these people would have been running around naked. Is that why they hated tailors? Were they secretly nudists who wanted no part in this clothes business? I’m going to have to look into this business of people disliking tailors. I’ll let you know what I find out in the future.

These four sons learn that they have to make their own way in the world. They can’t let someone else pave their way. That’s very true. Even if you inherit millions of dollars, you’ve got to stand on your own two feet sometime. You have to develop yourself. You have to be you.

These sons also learn that each of them are valuable for who they are. They each have a part to play and they can each contribute. If one of them were gone it would leave this gaping hole in their plans. They create this “whole” with their unique parts. Even though I highly value the idea of individuality, each of us do form part of a “whole.” We’re part of a society, we’re part of a relationship, we’re part of a family, we’re part of an organization, we’re part of a company, and so on and so forth. We would create this gap if we disappeared. Our individuality would be missed as a working part of those organizations. Sure, eventually someone would fill in, but they wouldn’t fill the role in the same manner that you did. The organization just wouldn’t work in exactly the same manner as it did before.

Overall

The dad in this story was probably one of those dads that simply threw his kids in the lake for swimming lessons.


The Tailor in Heaven

The Tailor in HeavenSummary

The Tailor in Heaven obviously is a Grimm’s tale with a more religious leaning. Like I mentioned before this is a product of the time in which the tale was created. People told all kinds of religious stories back in the day because that was what their lives revolved around.

Once upon a time God decided that he wanted to spend time in the heavenly garden and he took all the apostles and saints with him and left no one in heaven but St. Peter. If you didn’t know this already, St. Peter is the person, according to tradition, that is responsible for letting people in the gates of heaven. God told Peter not to let anybody in while he was away.

After a while a tailor came to the door of heaven. He asked Peter to let him in and stated that he was just a poor honest tailor. Peter doesn’t think the tailor is honest because he snips away bits of cloth from people’s clothes when they bring them in to be altered. The tailor, quite correctly, states that it isn’t theft if little pieces of cloth fall away while mending clothes. The tailor says, “Look let me in, I’ll do all the dirty work. I’ll take care of the children. I’ll wash their clothes. I’ll clean the benches they play on and I’ll sew up all the holes in their clothes.”

Peter does fill a bit sorry for him so he lets him in and tells him to sit in the corner behind the door of heaven that God may not see him when he gets back. Well, once Peter was out of sight the tailor got curious and decided to poke his nose in every corner of heaven. In one area he found many beautiful chairs, but one was higher than the others and made of gold. It also had a gold footstool. The tailor decided to sit in the chair, which was God’s.

While sitting in the chair he was able to see all that was going on down on Earth. He observed an old washer woman doing the wash, but taking out two veils from the wash to keep for herself. This made the tailor angry so he picked up God’s footstool and threw it at her. He couldn’t figure out a way to get the footstool back so he went back to his place behind the door.

Well, God came back and asked Peter where his footstool was. Peter told him he did not know and that nobody had been in heaven except for one tailor who was still sitting behind the door. Well, God decides to talk to this tailor. The tailor tells him everything.

God says:

“Oh you knave…were I to judge as you judge, how do you think you could have escaped so long? I should long ago have had no chairs, benches, seats, nay, not even an oven-fork, but should have thrown everything down at the sinners. Henceforth you can stay no longer in heaven, but must go outside the door again. Then go where you will. No one will give punishment here, but I alone, the Lord.”

Well the tailor had to go back outside. To wait a while.

The End

The tailor in heavenObservations

God is kind of mean in this story. Here’s the thing, there is an argument that different religions answer differently. This argument is all about the nature of God. Is God forgiving and loving or is he full of wrath and can stand no unclean thing? We have both of these views of God from The Bible, The Book or Mormon, the Apocrypha, and many other books of scripture and endless musings by religious people. Some religions tend to look at God as only this person who brings vengeance down on people. Other people like to see God as this all-forgiving and all-loving being. The God in this story is definitely more on the vengeance side, but not completely.

God in this story has some very human traits. He goes out to enjoy himself and says that Peter can’t let anybody in while he is gone. I can’t imagine that God would abandon his post for a while. I do have to wonder why the heaven in this tale apparently only includes God, apostles and saints. Where is everyone else at? The story specifically says that God takes the apostles and saints to the garden and heaven is completely empty except for Saint Peter. So no other good people are in heaven? Where are the other inhabitants of heaven? Where are all these children mentioned by the tailor?

This give us a little indication about the religious beliefs of the people who created this tale. They clearly saw God as this strict entity. I don’t agree.

Notice that Peter is dishonest with God in this story, but is not treated in the same manner as the tailor. Peter lets somebody into heaven when God has already told him not to do so. Peter as you may or may not know, was a man who denied Christ three times. God forgave him at some point right? Jesus knew that Peter was going to deny him because he told Peter, “Hey you’re going to deny me three times before the rooster crows in the morning.” I assume Peter was forgiven; no, I believe that Peter was forgiven. In my opinion, this tailor has done nothing to deserve being booted out of heaven. Peter was dishonest, no punishment, but the tailor does something and gets punished.

The tailor in heavenThemes

This one is easy. Only God can judge. Only God can mete out punishment. Only God can deem you worthy enough to enter into heaven. Only God can truly forgive your sins. Easy-peasy…lemon squeezy. That’s it. That’s the moral.

This isn’t news. There are repeated references in the Bible that say only God judges. Vengeance is mine saith the Lord. God put you in the Earth and he can take you out of it. The end. I don’t know how much more simple I can get with the theme of this story.

There are two examples where this is illustrated in this story.

Example A: God says to Peter, “Don’t let anyone in while I’m away.” Peter lets somebody in anyway, but when God finds out, the tailor has to go back out of heaven.

Example B: The tailor tries to provide punishment for theft down on the Earth. He tries to play God. God reprimands him, then makes him leave heaven.

Two different people tried to go against what God has said or rather provide services that God usually provides and both are shown that really this is God’s job and you cannot do it. The end.

I also want to say that maybe God tries to be judicious in his punishments. God talks to this tailor and he says, “Look I can’t be throwing furniture down at the earth every time somebody sins.” He acknowledges that people sin all the time and that they aren’t always punished immediately. He’s patient in a way or maybe he just really likes his furniture?

Overall

I am not impressed with the view of God in this story. He seems mean and unforgiving. The God I have in my mind is always willing to forgive if you’re willing to repent. This God is just like, “Yeah, quit touching my stuff.” This story is clearly a product of a more strict time in the history of Christianity. Remember the mom from The Water Boy? Remember how, to her, everything is wrong and everything is “the devil”? Remember that? That’s what this story reminds me. All the people in this story are doing the wrong thing and nothing they can do is the right thing. It’s like trying to flip a quarter and you keep calling “heads” but the coin is always “tails.”


The Valiant Little Tailor

The Valiant Little TailorSummary

The Valiant Little Tailor is a familiar story because Disney took it upon themselves to put Mickey at the center of its story once. I have seen the Mickey version before, but it does not include the entire tale.

Once upon a time there was a tailor who was busy at his work when he heard a woman calling outside. She was selling jam. He decided that he wanted some. He bought a quarter-pound of jam, or so, and put in some bread. Before he ate his jam and bread he decided to finish working on some thing or the other that he was sewing.

While he was busy at his task flies were attracted to the jam. Each time he scared them away more came back. Finally, he took a piece of cloth and swatted at the flies. He killed at least seven in one blow. He was so proud of this fact that he had girdle sewed that said, “Seven in one blow.” He decided his fly-killing skills were second-to-none and that he should go out into the world. He took a piece of cheese and a bird with him.

On the road he met a giant. The giant was a little perplexed about the seven in one blow thing. He automatically thought the tailor was a brave man who had killed seven men at once. He challenged the tailor. He asked the tailor if he could squeeze water out of a rock. The giant showed the tailor his rock-squeezing skills first. The tailor then squeezed the piece of cheese until liquid came out. The giant is getting to be impressed. Next the giant challenges the tailor to a rock throwing contest. The giant throws a rock into the air and it’s quite a while before it comes back to the Earth. The tailor is not deterred. He throws the bird he brought with him into the air and it doesn’t come back at all. The giant finally asks the tailor if he could carry a tree with him. The tailor says ok, and says that he will carry the branches, because they are the heaviest part of the tree. The giant picks up the trunk of the tree and proceeds to carry it all the while the tailor is sitting in the branches being carried by the giant.

After a while the giant pulls a cherry tree down to get at the best cherries. He lets go of the tree while the tailor is still hanging on and the tailor is flung quite some distance. The giant asks him why he cannot hold down a little cherry tree.  The tailor said that he could hold down a cherry tree, but that he had chosen to leap very far because there were hunters in the woods. The giant tries to leap over the tree and fails.

The giant then takes the tailor back to his cave, where several other giants sleep. The bed is so big that the tailor curls up only in a corner of it. One of the giants tries to do him in during the night, but since the tailor only slept on the corner of the bed, no harm came to him. The next day the tailor was fine as usual and met the giants on the road. They were surprised to see him alive.

The tailor goes on his way. He falls asleep in a palace’s courtyard where some soldiers see him and his clothing that says seven in one blow. They think he is a great warrior and they tell the king. The king is only too happy to have him in the forces. Soon though, the soldiers become scared that the tailor will kill them and they ask to resign from the military. The king doesn’t want to lose his military or risk being smited by the tailor, so he tells the tailor that if he can kill two giants he will let him marry his daughter and give him half his kingdom.

The tailor agrees and eschews any help. He climbs up in a tree above the two giants in question and pelts them with rocks while they are sleeping. Each of the giants think the other giant is the cause of the blows so they get into a fight and kill each other. The tailor stabs them with his sword after they are dead and goes back to the king wanting his reward. The king was expecting the tailor to bite the dust. Quickly, the king decides there must be another challenge.

The king says there is a boar that terrorizes a forest. If the tailor catches it, he can have his reward. The tailor finds the boar and tricks it into getting stuck in a church window. The king is, once again, surprised the tailor is still alive and also doesn’t want to give him the promised reward.

Another challenge is created. The king tells the tailor there is a unicorn that has become a nuisance or it’s too fabulous, it’s some such excuse. The tailor, once again, turns down any help and goes in search of the unicorn. He finds the unicorn and stands in front of a tree trunk while the unicorn is charging him. The tailor moves out of the way at the last-minute and the unicorn drives its horn deep into the tree trunk. The tailor saddles the unicorn up, cuts it free from the tree and rides it back to the king.

The king pretty much has no choice, but to give this tailor what he promised. The princess marries the tailor but suspects that he used to do menial labor because of something he said in his sleep. The king thinks up a plan to get rid of the tailor once he is asleep, but the tailor has heard the plan. On the night in question, he pretends to be asleep and sleep talks about all his grand deeds. The would-be assassins are too scared to pursue their plan. The tailor stays married to the princess and becomes king.

The End

The Valiant Little TailorObservations

While I agree that this tailor is brave, I don’t know why he deserves any of the things he got. He isn’t really strong and it’s almost like he’s advertising falsely. He knows people will not understand or comprehend what his shirt actually says.

We do have our number three back in this tale, but we also have the number seven, which to some, is lucky.  I guess this number is also the tailor’s lucky number. He did use it to do great things.

I am not enthused about this tale. I don’t find it particularly interesting and I’m just not into it at all. I really do find most of the Grimms tales very interesting, but this one is lost on me. I guess maybe it’s because of the Mickey thing, but I really don’t appreciate this tale at all.

I don’t like the tailor. He’s a trickster and someone who lies by not telling the whole truth. He lets people assume things about him and then just goes with the consequences. You know who else does that? Con artists. The tailor is a con artist. All these years we’ve been looking at this tailor like he’s so brave and he’s so awesome, but in reality he should be on American’s Most Wanted for lying and defrauding the government, because that’s what he does. He defrauded the king. That’s treason.

Although, I am generally not pro-government and you won’t see me being all patriotic anywhere, it is true that you aren’t supposed to lie to the government. You can get in some mighty big trouble when you’ve lied on your tax return and the audit people come around.

I forgot to mention that the little tailor actually yells at the flies that are trying to get on his jam, but they don’t listen because they don’t speak German. That’s what the story says. What language do flies speak? Obviously, sie sprechen nicht Deutsch. You can look that up, if you’re wondering what it means.

The Valiant Little TailorThemes

Is the theme of this story something like, “Sometimes con artists win and get the good things in life while you slave your butt off to put bread on the table?” Or is it something like, “You too can be a con artist. Apply at the Little Tailor school of Conartistry today. We’re “accredited”.”

I know people look at this tale for the bravery aspect. It’s generally, oh this little tailor was so small, but he killed a giant. While it is true that sometimes people can do unexpected things based on their outward appearances, I have a hard time with saying that’s the theme of this tale. Yes, it is true that the little old granny you see sitting in the corner might just be a yoga master who can bend herself into a pretzel. That might be true and, honestly, it would be pretty cool if it were true. That’s fine and all, we can have unexpected people like that. It’s how humanity works. Sometimes other human beings surprise us with their deeds. That’s normal life though, what in the heck is this story going on about?

I can’t get over the fact that this guy, this tailor, is a con artist. Why are we celebrating that? Yes, we are celebrating that fact as long as we continue to tell this story. We are celebrating a con artist. At one point in time, your beloved Mickey played a con artist. That’s not the Mickey you know and love.

Is it ok to praise a con artist? By definition a con artist is dishonest. So if we praise a con artist, we’re praising dishonesty. Usually, we don’t like dishonesty. When you’re making up your resume, you don’t put ‘dishonesty’ for one of your skills, customer service maybe, but not dishonesty. We are not a society that values dishonesty. I don’t know why we value the tailor in this tale.

It’s true that the tailor is clever, and we can totally value cleverness, but we don’t want to value dishonesty. Here’s the thing…some people value dishonesty. They value the idea that you can trick people into believing all manner of things. I honestly have to think that maybe this tale was less a children’s tale and more of an alehouse tale. I imagine drunken farmers, or whomever, would gather at the local pub over ale and speak about men like the tailor. I have to think it was more of a ‘what if’ scenario that snowballed into this full-blown tale of this brave tailor. This tale has its own naughtiness aspect to it.

Generally, naughty does not equal a tale for children. Trust me, if a parent back in the time of this tale’s creation caught their child conning people like the tailor in this story, there would be bruises. I can’t speak for everyone, but I can say that I don’t envision parents sitting their children down and telling them a tale about this tailor who conned his way to the top. Remember, there are people who went to mass and other church services and confessed their sins. They weren’t going to be down with instilling this terrible example in their children.

I could be totally wrong though. There could have been parents who told this to their kid every night and the kid ended up the most pious person ever.

Overall

I don’t like this little man. I think he sucks. I don’t like how he is a con artist. I don’t like how this story praises the idea of being a con artist. I don’t like how this story praises the idea of being mis-leading. This tailor just rubs me the wrong way.